LEARN TO WALK WITH MY FATHER

Last year, I heard a very surprising news. My mother, 74 year old mother, was diagnosed with stadium III Lung cancer. It was like the sky fell down on me, I'm sure my siblings also felt the same way.

We prayed to God to heal my mother because - we feel - we still need her. Along with that - until now - we search for ways to cure my mother.

Not so long after that, I was called to work in Jakarta. It is my dream job, I become a teacher. With hard feeling, I received the job and leave my mother with the helper in Bandung. My sisters and a brother live nearby my mother's house, so I thought they would be able to take care of her. I go home every two weeks up to once a week, depends on lots of reasons.

Last week, my brother called me to go home to Bandung, because my mom - now almost 75 - was so weak. The reason was, she couldn't eat nor drink anything. We persuade her to check to a hospital. It turned up that her lungs were almost filled with water, because of the cancer. We need to put the plastic pipes to both sides of the lungs. After that, for days, I saw my mother in terrible pain. I felt so helpless, because I couldn't do anything. I only could try to comfort her by being by her side for 5 days...

I prayed for miracles. At least one miracle. Everyday as much as I could. On the 5th day, my mother had her CT-scan, I sang a spiritual song as a prayer to my mother's ear. She was put into the scanner bed. She painfully screaming. Then, inside , alone, she say a prayer... "God, my life is You, You will never leave me alone. I'm your child..." That was what I remembered. Not long after that, when she had the radiation, she felt 2 persons holding her right and left arms. Strongly. My mother thought they were us, her children. She opened her eyes, nobody was there, but she still felt the holding arms... A miracle did happen...

She told us the story. We were so happy. God listened to our prayer.

On the sixth day I had to go back to Jakarta, I had been asking for permission but I felt so bad to leave work too long because I'm still new there. I asked my siblings to give me a call as soon as they receive any news from the doctor.

On the seventh day, I called my brother because my siblings didn't call. I heard a good news. My mother is recovering, she's now can sit on the bed, although the plastic pipes still attached to the lungs. But there was also a bad news. My mother's cancer now begin to enter stadium IV. I was crying sadly... I don't understand... Miracles happen at the past - and also I believe, it still happens today. But, I asked, why didn't God heal my mother yet ?....

I try to say this to myself as a prayer to God, "God, let it be what you want it to be. Give us strength to receive the news. I don't understand Your decision, but please make us believe that everything happens under your permission. Miracles do happen, but Your decision is the best for my mother and us..."

Until now, it's still hard to believe. But, I keep my faith to God. I will let my Father guide us, make us strong while we continue our strive to find the cure for my mother. We might need to sell our property for that, but in every way, I believe that His plan will happen for our good. We will continue to walk with our Father...

If anyone happen to read this, please also pray for us in Indonesia. Our knowledge is limited, so is our finance. But Our God is unlimited, He will take care of us. But we still need your prayer and help...

May God bless you.....